by Joan Krimston, L.C.S.W.
We have hardwood floors in our house.
Each family member has a different cadence as they walk down the hallway, the pitch and rhythm of our steps communicating something unique and individualized.
My middle son’s steps are boisterous and deliberate and kind of loud.
While my oldest slides across the wooden strips gently and slowly, almost inaudible.
My youngest sons’s size 12 feet saunter rather matter of factly from one destination to the next.
Mine are quick and light. I like to think it has something to do with my dance background and my fondness for fireflies and ninjas. We can decipher each other’s footsteps.
Understanding our footprint in the world can enhance our life experience. We have entered a phase in the Coronavirus pandemic that feels like a psychogenic fugue, where we are stuck in this strange and foreign place, trying to escape, but not knowing how.
Most of us are emotionally exhausted, irritable, lethargic and apathetic. How many days have you flicked the potato chip crumbs off of your pajamas and asked yourself whether you showered? Blink and it’s dark outside. Groundhog day over and over and over again. We just want to get our mojo back and go back to pre-pandemic times.
We are all wanting and needing different things on our uniquely personal timetables.
One of the most impactful things we can do is get to know our distinct nervous system.
By understanding how it works for us personally, we are able to help ourselves and those around us by responding to its ever-changing nature.
The nervous system is a highly complex set of nerves that run from the brain down along the spinal column. Our senses process about 11 million bits of information per second from our environment. Everything we perceive through our senses is processed through the nervous system which constantly sifts through astounding amounts of data while it scans and processes our surroundings.
How do we meet change? How do we meet stagnation? How do we deal with the unknown? The answers begin with being present and responding rather than reacting.
We need to cocoon, to pause, to pay attention in order to focus on what is before us.
By slowing down and dialing in, we get clear signals about what we need from our body to restore our nervous systems.
Emotions are just constantly changing energy. Our bodies hold these feelings in a million different ways.
BREATHE
Start by finding a comfortable space to be, place your hands on your belly and take a few easy breaths–inhaling through your nose and gently exhaling through your mouth. Extend the exhale. This is a little jewel straight out of a neuroscientist’s lab at Stanford. Making the exhale longer than the inhale actually calms the nervous system.
Bring awareness to what is going on in your mind and in your body. Ask yourself what you are feeling. Name it.
How can you meet this feeling? State it.
Try it.
LISTEN
Take the opportunity to respond to yourself and whatever is coming your way differently than your usual reaction. This definitely takes some practice.
Ultimately, you will strengthen that resiliency muscle. This can be done one micro-change at a time. Most of us have that little voice in the back of our head whispering to us. Listen to yours.. Our bodies possess great wisdom.
CREATE RITUAL
We humans function better with routine and ritual. There will be days when you feel like you just don’t have the energy to carry out a task. Sometimes we need to rest, and other times we need to encourage ourselves to propel forward. I am suggesting you talk to yourself the way you would support someone who needs encouragement. Imagine putting your arm around your own shoulder and telling yourself this is what we are going to do. We can do hard stuff.
SEEK SUNLIGHT
Go outside and be in the sunlight every day. Allow the rays to warm you, giving you all the benefits of Vitamin D and resetting your circadian rhythm. Fresh air and exposure to nature is an added side bonus.
DISCOVER NEW BOUNDARIES
Redirect the energy that is not serving you. Hello boundaries.. Sometimes we need to go inward and rest, and sometimes we need a jumpstart to utilize the energy in a particular way.
MOVE YOUR BODY
Take a hike. Climb some stairs or play your favorite music and dance around the room. Movement helps externalize stress and stuck feelings. A cool side effect of moving our bodies occurs when feel -good hormones are released into our bloodstream, lifting our mood.
SOCIALIZE
Being under quarantine and having to social distance has highlighted our desire to connect to ourselves, to others, to something bigger than ourselves.
We are social animals who thrive on connectedness. Find ways to talk, see and be with others. Make virtual plans. Conversely, if you feel it is too people-y in your house, find a way to take breaks for restoration. Build it into your day. Every day.
Get involved in something on a communal level. These experiences help us step outside of ourselves and focus on our communities and the planet. Sometimes it is just the shift one needs to get out of our stuckness.
Things are constantly changing. Many things are different from the way we are used to or want them to be. We do not know what the future looks like. This can be unnerving to many. We might resist or surrender. Being aware of our inner dialogue is critical.
Growth usually occurs at the edge of support and challenge, balancing how we adapt to ever-changing environments and experiences. This is the time to pause and reimagine how we want to meet this new way of living. This is our opportunity to grow new ways of being and strengthen our resiliency.
Joan Krimston, L.C.S.W.
11712 Moorpark Street, #102
Studio City, CA 91604
(818) 319-7006